When my understanding of spirit re-opened in my mid-thirties, my life changed dramatically.  Synchronicity kicked in and teachers and relationships ensued that expanded my horizon and brought a greater understanding of who we are and why we are here.  A co-worker at my “day-job” in business and sales asked how I balanced that work with my spiritual work.  Guided by spirit, my channeled answer was–My day job pays my salary.  The spiritual work pays my Soulary. ™


Classes and lectures on earning your Soulary™ are available now. Current Classes include:

  • Synchronicity and Soulary™–The Path Less Taken
  • Connecting with Guides and Spirit
  • Finding Balance Between Your Day Job and Spiritual Work
  • Your Soulary™ Goals

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  My book, Soulary: The Earnings of a Fulfilled Life, is coming soon!

May we all find our spiritual path and may we all earn our Soulary.™

In Memory of Judi

Judi–Summer of ’96

A few week’s back, I alluded to the 20th anniversary of the transition of my former partner Judi on January 8th, 1998. Longtime friends know this story and I wanted to share this with more of you. Our relationship was very special and meant to be. During our ordination and graduation from The New Seminary of New York in November of 1997, I honored Judi during my speech as class president. Laurie Sue was in the audience that day, heard me honoring Judi and was touched by what I said about her. Two years after Judi’s transition, Laurie Sue and I began our relationship.

I share this to bring hope to those who have also lost partners, through transition or divorce, and to let you know that when you open your heart to yourself and to spirit, all things are possible.

I carry only the most beautiful memories of Judi and am grateful that we were allowed to share the path together for that brief but rich and healing time. I wrote this shortly after her passing.
On January 8th, 1998, my late partner and soulmate, Judi, went through transition. Her final healing came three years after the diagnosis of breast cancer…a three-year odyssey during which she found love and light in her life.

A mutual friend introduced us shortly after her diagnosis. She elected to seek both traditional and alternative treatment and had expressed an interest in Reiki and visualization meditation. Our mutual friend asked if I would speak with her about these modalities and I agreed to meet with her.

When we met, it was truly magical…. like something out of a romance novel. There was the immediate feeling of openness and trust, the comfort of being reunited with an old friend and the loving bond of soulmates. Within three weeks we were lovers, living together, and our partnership formed.

Judi was a very special, Special Education teacher. She worked at Central Park East Secondary School in East Harlem. As a seventh and eighth grade Resource Room teacher, she worked with troubled kids and showed each and every one of them that they had a special talent or gift and, more importantly, they were loved.

This was the one life lesson that Judi had trouble with herself. The issues of self-worth and self-love were Judi’s issues. It took a devastating disease like cancer to teach her the most important lesson. Our three years together, working with energy and spirit, helped to open her heart to God and the universe, helping her finally understand how much she was truly loved. She healed her relationship with her father who, at the age of 82, finally learned to say to her “I love you.” She healed her relationship with her mother who had passed three years before Judi’s cancer was diagnosed. She healed her heart in finding a man she could trust to love her and not hurt her. Ultimately, she healed her soul by realizing that God loved her. These lessons were costly. The price she paid was two breast tumors, three brain tumors and finally lung cancer. But she worked through each and every one of these challenges with grace, humor and determination.

Learning this lesson was the completion of this lifetime’s work. When she went through transition on January 8th, she may not have been “cured” of her physical ailment but she was certainly healed in heart, mind and spirit.

Even the time of her transition was touched with healing magic. The Monday prior to her transition she was in a deep coma and had not moved for several days. The decision was made by her doctor to disconnect her intravenous feeding. Mechanically, this was my responsibility because I had been taking care of her on home hospice. This act of “letting go” was very hard for me and I prayed silently at her bedside, asking for a sign that it was alright for me to disconnect her. After praying, I went into the bathroom to wash the tears from my face. When I returned to her bedside, her hands had moved over to her heart and solar plexus. I had her permission to remove the I.V. feeding.

When Wednesday arrived, I sensed that it would be the day of her transition. I realized that I didn’t have an appropriate suit for the funeral and left to go shopping. I drove about ten blocks and my “inner voice” told me to go back home. When I arrived, I noticed that her breathing pattern had changed from a “labored” breath to a very shallow peaceful breath and I called her father to join me at her bedside. Within two minutes, she drew her last breath. With her final exhalation, her lips, which had been down turned, curved up into a smile. I knew that she was at peace and with spirit.

That night, I was having difficulty trying to sleep. At about 11:30, our cats, who had been conspicuously absent all day, came out of hiding and joined me on the bed. They stretched out in front of me like two little sphinxes and then started staring at the doorway of the bedroom as if they were watching someone. I turned and saw nothing. Then I looked back at the cats and their heads, in one smooth synchronized motion, moved from gazing at the doorway up to the center of the room directly above the bed. I knew immediately that they were watching Judi’s spirit and at that moment I felt her hands touching my back gently. She was letting me know that she was with me.

I am grateful for the time we had together. We shared a lifetime in three years and touched each other’s lives forever. Her funeral was attended by more than three hundred people including fifty of her students. As part of her eulogy, I read some of the letters the kids had sent her. They used words like “greatest teacher” and “the shining light in our school” to describe her.

One of our seminary classmates sang Judi’s favorite song. “The Rose.” Tears welled up among the gathering as she sang…

“When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed, that with the sun’s love
In the spring, becomes the rose.”

I closed the eulogy with a quote from the mystic poet
Khalil Gibran–

“And all knowledge is vain save when there is work, and all work is empty save when there is love; and when you work with love you bind yourself to yourself, and to one another, and to God.”

Judi worked with love!